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KHUSUS UNTUK YANG HUMORIS

1. Dokter Gigi Dengan
Wartawan
Apa persamaan dokter gigi
dengan wartawan? Sama2
banyak membuka mulut orang....
2. Mpok Ipah
Mpok Ipah lagi jalan ditanya
ame Bang Udin
Bang Udin : Mo kemane pah?
Ipah : Ke RSCM.
Bang Udin : Siape yg sakit ?
Ipah : Buanyak !
3. Kebakaran Hutan
"kita harus belajar pada negara
lain agar tdk terjadi kebakaran
hutan lagi !" "Negara mana"
Arab...
4. Kata bijak hari ini
Hai kamu para wanita jangang
pernah percaya pada mulut pria
apalagi pada yang mengatakan
kamu cantik.
5. Tegas kuterima
"kalau jabatan pemimpin
cabang ku peroleh, aku akan
bersikap tegas" "kalau disuap..?"
"tegas kuterima!"
6. Perampokan
angkat tangan! Ini perampokan!
Yg gnteng kesebelah kanan, yg
cantik kesebelah kiri. Yg muka
jlek ktengah. Kamu! Ya kamu,
jgn pura2 baca sms. Ayo
ketengah
7. Keajaiban pria
Dapat masuk goa tanpa lampu.
Dapat mengapit telor tanpa
pecah. Dapat dijadikan mic
tanpa batere. Dapat tegang
tanpa aliran listrik.
8. 5 “m” persahabatan
_memahamii
_mmpercayai
_mennyayangii
_menjaga
_mnghargai
9. bikin atap pake BAMBU
bikin atap pake BAMBU maaf MENGGANGGU ,potong BAMBU
di atas KAIN, kamu lagi ngapain ??????makan MENTIMUN campur gula, lagi MELAMUN
ya?????daun TALAS daun KEDONDONG kalau sempat balas DONK…!!!!
10. ARTIS DILARANG MASUK

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powered by apiel.xtgem.com </p> <style type="text/css"> #xt_auth_container { position: static; display: inline; display: inline-block; text-align: right; margin: 3px 0; padding: 0; width: 100%; height: auto; border: none; } .xt_auth_view { position: static; display: inline; display: inline-block; text-align: right; margin: 0; padding: 0; width: auto; height auto; border: none; } .xt_auth_action { text-align: left; position: static; display: inline; zoom: 1; display: inline-block; vertical-align: top; margin: 0 5px 0 0; padding: 0 5px; height: 20px; width: auto; border: none; -webkit-border-radius: 3px; -moz-border-radius: 3px; -o-border-radius: 3px; border-radius: 3px; background-color: #2e2e2e; background-color: rgba(0,0,0,0.4); !background-color: #2e2e2e; font: 600 12px/20px "Helvetica Neue","HelveticaNeue",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; text-decoration: none; -webkit-text-shadow: 1px 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.08); -moz-text-shadow: 1px 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.08); -o-text-shadow: 1px 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.08); text-shadow: 1px 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.08); color: #fff; -webkit-user-select: none; } .xt_auth_action > * { vertical-align: top; } .xt_auth_action:hover { background-color: #1f1f1f; background-color: rgba(0,0,0,0.6); } .xt_auth_action:link, .xt_auth_action:visited, .xt_auth_action:active, .xt_auth_action:hover { text-decoration: none; color: #fff; } .xt_auth_icon, .xt_auth_avatar { position: static; display: inline; display: inline-block; width: 13px; height: 13px; margin: 3px 1px 0 0; padding: 0; vertical-align: top; border: 0; } .xt_auth_icon { background-image: url(http://xtgem.com/images/authbar/auth_sprite_v2.png); margin-right: 0; } .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_icon { background-size: 103px; /* margin: 4px 2px 0 0; */ } /* join & subscribe */ .xt_auth_join .xt_auth_icon, .xt_auth_subscribe .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -92px 13px; } /* inbox */ .xt_auth_inbox .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -78px 13px; } /* rate */ .xt_auth_rate .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 0 14px; } /* unrate */ .xt_auth_unrate .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -13px 14px; } /* star */ .xt_auth_star .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -26px 13px; } /* unstar */ .xt_auth_unstar .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -39px 13px; } /* repost */ .xt_auth_repost .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -52px 12px; margin-top: 4px; } /* reposted */ .xt_auth_reposted .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -65px 12px; margin-top: 4px; } /* join & subscribe */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_join .xt_auth_icon, .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_subscribe .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 11px 0.5px; width: 12px; } /* inbox */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_inbox .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 25px 1px; } /* rate */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_rate .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 0 0; } /* unrate */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_unrate .xt_auth_icon { background-position: -13px 0; } /* star */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_star .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 77px 0; } /* unstar */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_unstar .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 64px 0; } /* repost */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_repost .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 51px 1px; margin: 3px 0 0 0; } /* reposted */ .xt_auth_icon_enchanted .xt_auth_reposted .xt_auth_icon { background-position: 39px 1px; margin: 3px 0 0 0; } /* hidding */ .xt_auth_unstar, .xt_auth_unsubscribe, .xt_auth_unrate { display: none; } .xt_auth_action_star_active .xt_auth_unstar, .xt_auth_action_rate_active .xt_auth_unrate, .xt_auth_action_subscribe_active .xt_auth_unsubscribe { display: inline-block; } .xt_auth_action_star_active .xt_auth_star, .xt_auth_action_rate_active .xt_auth_rate, .xt_auth_action_subscribe_active .xt_auth_subscribe { display: none; } #xt_auth_container { position: fixed; } html { padding-top: 20px; } #xt_auth_container { top: 0; left: 0; } #xt_auth_container, .xt_auth_view, .xt_auth_icon, .xt_auth_avatar { max-height: none !important; max-width: none !important; min-width: none !important; min-width: none !important; opacity: 1 !important; text-indent: 0 !important; visibility:visible !important; } </style><div id='xt_auth_container'><div class='xt_auth_view xt_auth_not_logged'><a href='https://xtgem.com/auth/login?redir=VjFWemNrMUxVV2RRVFZWcWMyeGxRVWhVYVZoTWVsbFpSa1pSVFVkVlQwMU5kMlE5&s=VjFkVmJuVkpWVU5IVkV0TlIwdExSVVo2UmxkS2RqMDk%3D&is_a=0&is_f=0&via=New+authbar' target='_parent' class='xt_auth_action xt_auth_login'>Log in</a></div></div> <script type="text/javascript"> (function () { var doc = document; var body = doc.body; var xhr_done_auth = true; doc.addEventListener ? window.addEventListener( 'load', init, false ) : window.attachEvent( 'onload', init ); function init () { doc = document; body = doc.body; var el_auth = doc.getElementById( 'xt_auth_container' ); doc.addEventListener ? el_auth.addEventListener( 'click', hook_xhr_action, false ) : el_auth.attachEvent( 'onclick', hook_xhr_action ); if ( 'backgroundSize' in doc.body.style ) { if ( window.devicePixelRatio && window.devicePixelRatio > 1 ) { el_auth.className += ' xt_auth_icon_enchanted'; } } } // bind xhr links function hook_xhr_action ( e ) { var e = e || window.event; var target = e.target || e.srcElement; target = target.className == 'xt_auth_icon' ? target.parentNode : target; if ( target.getAttribute( 'data-xhr' ) ) { var url = target.href; url = url + (url.indexOf( '?' ) == -1 ? '?via_ajax=1' : '&via_ajax=1'); load_data({ url: url, xhr_done: xhr_done_auth, callback: handle_xhr_response }); (e.preventDefault) ? e.preventDefault() : e.returnValue = false; return false; } } function handle_xhr_response ( xhr ) { function handle_error ( xhr ) { window.location.href = window.location.href; } function handle_success ( xhr ) { var wrapper = document.getElementById( 'xt_auth_container' ); var tmp_class = wrapper.className; var current_action = xhr.response.split( ';' )[1]; var actions = { bookmark: 'xt_auth_action_star_active', vote: 'xt_auth_action_rate_active', subscribe: 'xt_auth_action_subscribe_active' }; for ( key in actions ) { if ( !actions.hasOwnProperty( key ) ) continue; if ( current_action.indexOf( key ) == -1 ) continue; wrapper.className = current_action.indexOf( 'un' ) == -1 ? tmp_class + ' ' + actions[key] : tmp_class.replace( (' ' + actions[key]), '' ); } } xhr.response = xhr.response ? xhr.response : xhr.responseText; (xhr.status != 200 || xhr.response.indexOf( 'ERR;') != -1 ) ? handle_error(xhr) : handle_success(xhr); } //load_data( { url: url, method: method, data: data, async: async, xhr_done: xhr_done, callback: callback }); function load_data( settings ) { var async = settings.async ? !!settings.async : true, url = settings.url ? settings.url.toString() : false, method = settings.method ? settings.method.toUpperCase() : 'GET', callback = settings.callback ? settings.callback : false, data = settings.data ? settings.data.toString() : '', xhr_done = settings.xhr_done ? settings.xhr_done : null, xhr; // xhr in progress or url not provided -> exit if ( !( (xhr_done == true || xhr_done == null) && url ) ) return; if ( typeof XMLHttpRequest !== 'undefined' ) { xhr = new XMLHttpRequest(); } else { try { xhr = new XMLHttpRequest("MSXML2.XmlHttp.5.0") || new XMLHttpRequest("MSXML2.XmlHttp.4.0") || new XMLHttpRequest("MSXML2.XmlHttp.3.0") || new XMLHttpRequest("MSXML2.XmlHttp.2.0") || new XMLHttpRequest("Microsoft.XmlHttp"); } catch ( e ) {} } // if xhr object does not supported or url not given, exit xhr.onreadystatechange = function () { if ( xhr.readyState != 4 ) return; if ( xhr_done != null ) xhr_done = true; callback ? callback( xhr ) : null; } xhr.open( method, url, async ); if ( method === 'POST' ) { xhr.setRequestHeader( "Content-type", "application/x-www-form-urlencoded" ); xhr.send( data ); } else { xhr.send( null ); } if ( xhr_done != null ) xhr_done = false; }; })(); </script></body></html>